The day I did something nasty to my good friend...

L is my good friend since 2002, when we were both working with the straitjacket organisation.

Values & Friends
Over the years, I have come to realise that those I remain friends with, people you "pick up where you left off", tend to be people who share the same values, ethics and principles as me, whether in personal relationships or at the workplace. L is one such person.

Crossroads
Last November, I was at the "crossroads of Damascus", about to take a long break off a project I had been on for the best part of 2007, when I met up with L. On the spur of the moment, we decided to do a test project together, which involved his friend X. For me, it was a sort of a swan song (albeit for the time being). Reason being, as 2007 drew to a close, I had increasingly felt very distracted, and that I wasn't putting "first things first" (like what Covey says). The failure to put "first things first" was really causing me a lot of low-level anxiety and stress.

So 2008 was to be for me, a year of focusing on my "first things" - in this case, God, Tin Hang Zai, and Little Pixie.

Stress & Anger
Anyway, back to the story. As the date drew nearer to the event, "things" happened. We got stressed, and we quarrelled.

Customer Service
L told me that the event was closed to foreigners after I had confirmed & registered one such person. The reason was one of those rubbish government-body reasons, and after calling up the government hotlines, I failed to get a good reason and all I got was "we cannot answer over the phone even though this is the XXX hotline. Please send us an email". (what the @#$@#$ the event is 1 day away!)

I disagreed with L over how to handle this person. In the end, L told him that we were bumping him off because of "oversubscription". The guy was pissed, and I explained to Hedgehog (who had referred the guy to us) the real reasons.

I felt very bad about the way we handled this, so I called up Mr Foreigner to explain the real reason and to apologise once again. Mr Foreigner was super-pissed, and he said he would "never attend any event organised by your company again". I was so traumatised by the entire episode. I was!

That's when L blew up at me " why didn't you check with me first before telling your friend the real reason? "

I shot back "Excuse me! In good faith, my friends publicise my event for me because they trust in the quality of my work! Do you think you would publicise events for friends who turn out shoddy work!?!? And if there's such a customer-service boo-boo, I don't want my friends wondering why I screwed up and questioning my work ethics in future!"

L shouted "ok, whatever it is, I reserve the right to make the FINAL decision on the event tomorrow".

With that, I shut up, clammed up, and completely disengaged myself emotionally from the event. I refused to participate anymore, or to try to contribute anything more. Since he wanted control of the final decision, fine, I'd just take instructions and not try to be smart.

It turned out that Mr Foreigner was actually working in a VERY IMPORTANT COMPANY and well, I don't dare to think about the potential biz we could have gained (but which we had now lost). L said "we already got 50 participants what, why you bother about that one guy?". *I rolled my eyes.* One deal from this VERY IMPORTANT COMPANY was worth many of the type of participants we were getting. And I mean, many.

Anger, Rage & Revenge
I was consumed with anger the next day. But it was no excuse for what I ended up doing to L. It_was_NO_excuse. When he asked for any words from me in closing the event, I had nothing to say. I was blinded by rage.

L said "you want to say something?"
I said "something".

I was blind to the 50 plus audience around.

WL tried to smooth things over for me by saying "she means, thank you".

I felt very guilty about it. I had a huge quarrel with L after the event, over this and over other issues.

Forgiveness & Grace
And I apologised to L and asked for his forgiveness. L forgave me, and I'm so grateful. But it doesn't stop me from feeling so guilty that I did that to my friend. I mean, whatever he did that made me mad, I had NO excuse to humiliate him, or embarrass myself in that way. I was not only sabotaging him, I was projecting a very poor image of myself at the same time. And I am feeling SOOOOO guilty. That's why I'm blogging about this to get the nasties out of my system.

Our friendship was salvaged. Thank God! A good friend who shares the same ethics, values and principles in life & work is hard to come by. Harder still is someone who forgives you after you have done something as mean as I did to L. And I nearly lost this friend out of my own doing!

But the feelings of regret, and guilt I now have, is certainly not worth the empty feelings of whatever fake triumph that limp attempt at revenge gave me.

I am so humbled by this whole episode. I really am....

This Subway sucks!!!

Subway is the Pixies' choice whenever we crave junk food and don't want to go the full-trans-fat way of McDonald's or KFC.

Usually we go to the one in Holland Village but I think we won't go there anymore!!!

Canton Pixie: Can I have my cheese packed separately?
Waiter: NO
Canton Pixie: huh? *shocked look cuz never had such a response before*
Waiter: We don't allow cuz not in our operating procedure.
Canton Pixie (firm voice): No, THAT's not true, cuz the last time I came here you did it for me!
Waiter: *shrugs* ok, actually not allowed
Canton Pixie: *rolls eyes*
Waiter: Why do you want to separate the cheese?
Canton Pixie: Because I want to eat it separately? *sarcastic tone*
Waiter: *sniggers*

This place really sucks. I've seen the male boss before - never smiles at anyone, never serves customers even when there is a long queue and all his staff are busy. Just stands behind them and stares. Even put up a sign reminding all customers to help them by clearing their own tables.

Rent A Toy!

This is neat! We rented this for $49! From Rent-A-Toy! They even include free delivery and pick-up!

And so one door closes...

Yogi Bear told Boringtazz and me that he thought we were better off starting everything from scratch rather than trying to work with Longkang Fish. Said that LongKang Fish might turn out to be more of a liability than a leverage. Hedgehog was kind enough to take the time to strategise with us in dealing with LongKang Fish. Mael was there to give moral support too.

Longkang Fish tried to get us to agree to a bad deal, and pay us peanuts in the process. The only thing attractive was the possibility of securing new leads from this engagement. But the Ts & Cs didn't really allow us to secure any new leads. So with that plus the peanuts pay (it does not even cover our babysitting costs), we had to stand our ground and say, we will accede to your terms of not securing any leads, but we can't charge this low.

From all appearances, this door is CLOSED. I feel a sense of relief, and the thought of starting from scratch, starting afresh, away from the old place, energises and excites me.

We may or may not get another deal outside of Longkang Fish, I don't know. But we are giving this our best shot. At the end of the day, we will know that we tried, and we tried our best. I guess that's what really matters.

This breakfast sucks!

Boringtazz and the Canton Pixie just embarked on a huge project they are both really excited about.

One of their first meetings was held at this place. It's great for brainstorming and serious work in the afternoons. Inspiration really hits when you go through stuff like Hotdog in a Baked Potato (Lactose-free!!!), Cream of Mushroom Soup with Garlic Cheese Croutons and Crepes with Ice Cream!

However, the breakfast set sucks!! The Pixie Family suffered from bloating and rumbling tummies after eating the Breko-fast! They took an entire day to recover!!

Withdrawal symptoms

One of the features of being a SAHM is that your sense of self-worth is constantly being assaulted.

Some of the remarks Airport & Cosmo have been guilty of passing:

"Since you have nothing to do, why don't you run these errands?"
"Since you are so free, why don't you help me call up XXX?"
"Why are you so tired? You are so free what?"

However, nothing beats what Longkang Fish, a nasty ex-colleague said.
"Canton Pixie, how's life? So, are you having withdrawal symptoms, now that you are doing nothing at home?"

What the !#$#@!#$??

Giordano - Is this business sense?

One of the old fogeys posed this question to me recently:

Giordano doesn't make sense. When it's raining, they should jack up the price of their umbrellas. Instead, they half it!

It set me thinking. Then I looked at the collection of Giordano umbrellas in my store. (At least 5 of them). Then I understood..and this is what I told the old fogey.

You see, they are buying goodwill with that half-price. Had they charged me double the usual price, I would probably have grudgingly bought the umbrella that first time in my hour of need, vowed never to be caught again, and zealously carry an umbrella everywhere I go.
Net revenue for Giordano - $24

But with this goodwill, I let my guard down. At the back of my mind, whenever I'm out, I'm like "Giordano's umbrellas go for half-price. And they are everywhere. If I'm caught, I can always get one since it's only half-price." I've even begun to hunt out Giordano's whenever it rains, because "their umbrellas go for half-price".
Net revenue for Giordano - 5 X $6 = $30 and still counting

That's why I have 5 Giordano umbrellas now. I'm sure I won't stop at 5. And that's why I think Giordano's makes sense.

Moral of the story : Goodwill makes good sustainable economic sense.