As much as I'm always making jibes at my family, in times like these, I'm really thankful that they are my family and that I'm part of theirs!
When the Grim's mother (ie my grandmother) passed away, and she had to be at the wake for like 5 days, Little Pixie and I were suddenly stuck without lunch for a few days.
I had to er, start cutting apron strings in a hurry, and it was really no joke trying to cook 3 big meals and snacks - breakfast, lunch, dinner and teatime on just one day.
I capitulated the other 4 days - we simply ate out! -
Since I'm allergic to every other dish in the hawker centre - all we had was Bee Tai Mak and more Bee Tai Mak!
When we couldn't stand it anymore, we leeched on the Goose!! (Gosh do I feel like a vermin now)
When I was younger, I used to make fun of them and grumble about all their idiosyncracies, irritating or annoying behaviour. But, time goes by, there are ups and downs in life - and as cliched as it may sound - they look more and more beautiful through the untinted glasses of adversity and maturity.
I can't imagine how the Grim really handles the following:
- babysits 2 kids for a pittance (24 x 7 - the kids go home for a few hours every Sunday)
- cooks lunch for Adult Baby (that's me) and Little Pixie on schooldays (that's 5 days a week!)
- insists on doing household chores herself after kids sleep, refuses even part-time maid,
- insists on cooking dinner for the entire household 5 nights a week.
I can't imagine either how the Goose takes care of:
- cooking 5 nights a week for a household of VERY FUSSY EATERS who won't eat anything green and who eat at different times of the night, from 5pm to 9pm.
- babysits 2 VERY FUSSY KIDS
- being the primary caregiver for a high-needs senior
- waking up every hour each night to tend to the Gnome's needs, and never making up for her lost sleep by taking day naps
- wanting to do everything herself despite having a capable and kind domestic helper
I don't think the Goose has an easier job than the Grim just because she has a helper and the Grim doesn't. I think both have it real tough. And I've learnt to really appreciate them, and the love that is written all over their sacrifices and acts for the family (despite all their fogey demeanours that inspired their respective nicknames!!!).
I've just undergone what turned out to be a rather not-so-minor surgery on my tummy. Doctor says part of my tummy muscle's been damaged - so no exercise allowed for the next 3 months. Don't want to burst the wound!
Tin Hang Zai had the wisdom to suggest I do so during the March hols, and he was so sweet to take a week's leave to care for me.
I'm so grateful to everyone because Little Pixie got to attend the Goose Daycare (meals, nap, bath - what more could I ask???) for the entire week after I was operated on. Grim Daycare was out because the 2 charges inside were sick from a virus. This left Tin Hang Zai free to be my house-helper since I couldn't really move around!
And get this, I got homecooked steamed fish & vegetables & rice & tonic soup from Goose Tingkat Services daily for lunch & dinner, delivered by the Tin Hang Zai Courier Services which also provided Little Pixie's transport to the Goose Daycare. And since the Goose Tingkat doesn't operate on weekends, I was certainly very blessed to have hot meals, ALLERGY-FREE from Grim Tingkat.
The list doesn't end there.
Cosmo came to visit me and kindly donated her hand-me-up magazines, and I had friends (you know who you are: - Miss Quiet, Miss Intellectual, Miss Music, Miss Salmon, Miss Koala, and Miss J) who prayed for me and kept me company with your smses.
Lastly, I had received another cake order for the Pixie Fudge-Frosted Chocolate Cake this weekend but really did not feel up to it. So Airport agreed to help me fulfil the order!
Thank You to my Friends and Family!
I really thank God for you all!
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Friday, March 20, 2009
Thursday, February 28, 2008
God is a Matchmaker! (Part 2 of 2)
Lasik and I have known each other for, er... 18 years. (!!!!!)
She first knew me as a flirt (I think). Perhaps one of the class muggertoads (hey! This was Muggertoads Girls' School what!)
I don't know if she was also a muggertoad. But I first knew her (and remembered her!) as the tall girl at the back who complained that my cough (real) sounded fake!
Lasik is the most conscientious and precise person I know. You can really depend on her to see things through. And I mean, REALLY see things through. And she is a dear friend to me. And she has been through some really miraculous times as well. And, after 18 years, she still looks like the way she did 18 years ago!
Meeting Mr Corny-and-sometimes-bad-Jokes for the first time was a funny experience. He's one of those folks who makes you feel that it's okay to make jibes at him about his erm, physique. But he is a very deep guy as well, as I found out over the past year or so.
Even though his jokes can be really bad, he does seem like the Creator's perfect "let your hair down" complement to Lasik's "we MUST get it RIGHT" style.
Congrats, Lasik & Mr Corny-and-sometimes-bad-Jokes !!!
She first knew me as a flirt (I think). Perhaps one of the class muggertoads (hey! This was Muggertoads Girls' School what!)
I don't know if she was also a muggertoad. But I first knew her (and remembered her!) as the tall girl at the back who complained that my cough (real) sounded fake!
Lasik is the most conscientious and precise person I know. You can really depend on her to see things through. And I mean, REALLY see things through. And she is a dear friend to me. And she has been through some really miraculous times as well. And, after 18 years, she still looks like the way she did 18 years ago!
Meeting Mr Corny-and-sometimes-bad-Jokes for the first time was a funny experience. He's one of those folks who makes you feel that it's okay to make jibes at him about his erm, physique. But he is a very deep guy as well, as I found out over the past year or so.
Even though his jokes can be really bad, he does seem like the Creator's perfect "let your hair down" complement to Lasik's "we MUST get it RIGHT" style.
Congrats, Lasik & Mr Corny-and-sometimes-bad-Jokes !!!
Saturday, February 16, 2008
God is a Matchmaker!! (Part 1 of X)
Do you believe in miracles? I do. This is one of them.I've known Miss Sweet-and-Gentle-Spirit
since, er, 2001. She is the prettiest, er, school chaplain I have ever seen, and she has the most beautiful heart too. Full of compassion, empathy, and all the good things you can ever think of.
Our Prison Group was very sad to see her go when God called her to the mission field. I supposed she was one of those that Paul referred to in Corinthians about "making eunuchs of themselves" - because whilst I had never doubted her attractiveness as a potential mate, I had never heard her mention anything about desiring marriage. So I assumed that she, well, wasn't interested.
Indeed, Miss Intellectual told us that when she went to the mission field, she "gave up", because you couldn't imagine finding a mate in that particular field. Turns out, God had other plans. It sounded exactly like what I read about in this book.
Guess what, the Honest Guy whom our Matchmaker had prepared for her (and her for him) appeared miraculously in that place, for a medical appointment that never happened! Instead it was an appointment with the Master Surgeon - who was showing him the "rib" that had been taken out of him!
Each was all that the other had been praying and waiting for all these years. And more.
Can you imagine waiting for "the one" till you are 37 or 42? She who had never believed in whirlwind romances has been blessed by our humorous God in the "twinkling of an eye".
We are all so excited!
Saturday, February 09, 2008
The day I did something nasty to my good friend...
L is my good friend since 2002, when we were both working with the straitjacket organisation.
Values & Friends
Over the years, I have come to realise that those I remain friends with, people you "pick up where you left off", tend to be people who share the same values, ethics and principles as me, whether in personal relationships or at the workplace. L is one such person.
Crossroads
Last November, I was at the "crossroads of Damascus", about to take a long break off a project I had been on for the best part of 2007, when I met up with L. On the spur of the moment, we decided to do a test project together, which involved his friend X. For me, it was a sort of a swan song (albeit for the time being). Reason being, as 2007 drew to a close, I had increasingly felt very distracted, and that I wasn't putting "first things first" (like what Covey says). The failure to put "first things first" was really causing me a lot of low-level anxiety and stress.
So 2008 was to be for me, a year of focusing on my "first things" - in this case, God, Tin Hang Zai, and Little Pixie.
Stress & Anger
Anyway, back to the story. As the date drew nearer to the event, "things" happened. We got stressed, and we quarrelled.
Customer Service
L told me that the event was closed to foreigners after I had confirmed & registered one such person. The reason was one of those rubbish government-body reasons, and after calling up the government hotlines, I failed to get a good reason and all I got was "we cannot answer over the phone even though this is the XXX hotline. Please send us an email". (what the @#$@#$ the event is 1 day away!)
I disagreed with L over how to handle this person. In the end, L told him that we were bumping him off because of "oversubscription". The guy was pissed, and I explained to Hedgehog (who had referred the guy to us) the real reasons.
I felt very bad about the way we handled this, so I called up Mr Foreigner to explain the real reason and to apologise once again. Mr Foreigner was super-pissed, and he said he would "never attend any event organised by your company again". I was so traumatised by the entire episode. I was!
That's when L blew up at me " why didn't you check with me first before telling your friend the real reason? "
I shot back "Excuse me! In good faith, my friends publicise my event for me because they trust in the quality of my work! Do you think you would publicise events for friends who turn out shoddy work!?!? And if there's such a customer-service boo-boo, I don't want my friends wondering why I screwed up and questioning my work ethics in future!"
L shouted "ok, whatever it is, I reserve the right to make the FINAL decision on the event tomorrow".
With that, I shut up, clammed up, and completely disengaged myself emotionally from the event. I refused to participate anymore, or to try to contribute anything more. Since he wanted control of the final decision, fine, I'd just take instructions and not try to be smart.
It turned out that Mr Foreigner was actually working in a VERY IMPORTANT COMPANY and well, I don't dare to think about the potential biz we could have gained (but which we had now lost). L said "we already got 50 participants what, why you bother about that one guy?". *I rolled my eyes.* One deal from this VERY IMPORTANT COMPANY was worth many of the type of participants we were getting. And I mean, many.
Anger, Rage & Revenge
I was consumed with anger the next day. But it was no excuse for what I ended up doing to L. It_was_NO_excuse. When he asked for any words from me in closing the event, I had nothing to say. I was blinded by rage.
L said "you want to say something?"
I said "something".
I was blind to the 50 plus audience around.
WL tried to smooth things over for me by saying "she means, thank you".
I felt very guilty about it. I had a huge quarrel with L after the event, over this and over other issues.
Forgiveness & Grace
And I apologised to L and asked for his forgiveness. L forgave me, and I'm so grateful. But it doesn't stop me from feeling so guilty that I did that to my friend. I mean, whatever he did that made me mad, I had NO excuse to humiliate him, or embarrass myself in that way. I was not only sabotaging him, I was projecting a very poor image of myself at the same time. And I am feeling SOOOOO guilty. That's why I'm blogging about this to get the nasties out of my system.
Our friendship was salvaged. Thank God! A good friend who shares the same ethics, values and principles in life & work is hard to come by. Harder still is someone who forgives you after you have done something as mean as I did to L. And I nearly lost this friend out of my own doing!
But the feelings of regret, and guilt I now have, is certainly not worth the empty feelings of whatever fake triumph that limp attempt at revenge gave me.
I am so humbled by this whole episode. I really am....
Values & Friends
Over the years, I have come to realise that those I remain friends with, people you "pick up where you left off", tend to be people who share the same values, ethics and principles as me, whether in personal relationships or at the workplace. L is one such person.
Crossroads
Last November, I was at the "crossroads of Damascus", about to take a long break off a project I had been on for the best part of 2007, when I met up with L. On the spur of the moment, we decided to do a test project together, which involved his friend X. For me, it was a sort of a swan song (albeit for the time being). Reason being, as 2007 drew to a close, I had increasingly felt very distracted, and that I wasn't putting "first things first" (like what Covey says). The failure to put "first things first" was really causing me a lot of low-level anxiety and stress.
So 2008 was to be for me, a year of focusing on my "first things" - in this case, God, Tin Hang Zai, and Little Pixie.
Stress & Anger
Anyway, back to the story. As the date drew nearer to the event, "things" happened. We got stressed, and we quarrelled.
Customer Service
L told me that the event was closed to foreigners after I had confirmed & registered one such person. The reason was one of those rubbish government-body reasons, and after calling up the government hotlines, I failed to get a good reason and all I got was "we cannot answer over the phone even though this is the XXX hotline. Please send us an email". (what the @#$@#$ the event is 1 day away!)
I disagreed with L over how to handle this person. In the end, L told him that we were bumping him off because of "oversubscription". The guy was pissed, and I explained to Hedgehog (who had referred the guy to us) the real reasons.
I felt very bad about the way we handled this, so I called up Mr Foreigner to explain the real reason and to apologise once again. Mr Foreigner was super-pissed, and he said he would "never attend any event organised by your company again". I was so traumatised by the entire episode. I was!
That's when L blew up at me " why didn't you check with me first before telling your friend the real reason? "
I shot back "Excuse me! In good faith, my friends publicise my event for me because they trust in the quality of my work! Do you think you would publicise events for friends who turn out shoddy work!?!? And if there's such a customer-service boo-boo, I don't want my friends wondering why I screwed up and questioning my work ethics in future!"
L shouted "ok, whatever it is, I reserve the right to make the FINAL decision on the event tomorrow".
With that, I shut up, clammed up, and completely disengaged myself emotionally from the event. I refused to participate anymore, or to try to contribute anything more. Since he wanted control of the final decision, fine, I'd just take instructions and not try to be smart.
It turned out that Mr Foreigner was actually working in a VERY IMPORTANT COMPANY and well, I don't dare to think about the potential biz we could have gained (but which we had now lost). L said "we already got 50 participants what, why you bother about that one guy?". *I rolled my eyes.* One deal from this VERY IMPORTANT COMPANY was worth many of the type of participants we were getting. And I mean, many.
Anger, Rage & Revenge
I was consumed with anger the next day. But it was no excuse for what I ended up doing to L. It_was_NO_excuse. When he asked for any words from me in closing the event, I had nothing to say. I was blinded by rage.
L said "you want to say something?"
I said "something".
I was blind to the 50 plus audience around.
WL tried to smooth things over for me by saying "she means, thank you".
I felt very guilty about it. I had a huge quarrel with L after the event, over this and over other issues.
Forgiveness & Grace
And I apologised to L and asked for his forgiveness. L forgave me, and I'm so grateful. But it doesn't stop me from feeling so guilty that I did that to my friend. I mean, whatever he did that made me mad, I had NO excuse to humiliate him, or embarrass myself in that way. I was not only sabotaging him, I was projecting a very poor image of myself at the same time. And I am feeling SOOOOO guilty. That's why I'm blogging about this to get the nasties out of my system.
Our friendship was salvaged. Thank God! A good friend who shares the same ethics, values and principles in life & work is hard to come by. Harder still is someone who forgives you after you have done something as mean as I did to L. And I nearly lost this friend out of my own doing!
But the feelings of regret, and guilt I now have, is certainly not worth the empty feelings of whatever fake triumph that limp attempt at revenge gave me.
I am so humbled by this whole episode. I really am....
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